Schönbrunn’s main attraction

Every tourist coming to Vienna will visit the Schönbrunn castle. Just because you have to. There are many attractions there: the grand castle, the coach museum, the park, the zoo, the gloriette and what else. But I think the main attractions seem to be: squirrels.


Carrie Bradshaw called them “rats with nice fur coats”, but obviously tourists seem to be of the opposite view. Everywhere they are kneeling down, holding out hands, making strange sucking, smooching and slupring noises to attract them. Regulars feed them with nuts and have their special places. Kids are screaming “Mummy where!? Mummy where!?” and mummys are screaming back “over there, look, over there.” Other mothers scream: “Don’t go near or they’ll bite you! You’ll get rabies!” Depending on protectiveness, I think. One of them said: “I don’t like squirrels, one of them chewed my finger to the bone.” What? I also overheard a girl say to her boyfriend: “see, there is one. I am not fantasizing as you said.” But that opens up a whole different set of questions, I don’t want to go into right now.

Why are those little bastards so popular? I say because of their black little round eyes and cuty furry appearance. Also the sudden and unexpected contact to nature is a wonderful thing for city tourists. Or they’ll look at anything that is to look at for free.

Anyway, if you come to Vienna: go see Schönbrunn, visit the squirrels, don’t forget to bring some nuts.

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