Archive for August, 2007

I hate this subway announcer

I hate this subway announcer. You know the one, with the super-energized, format radio amateuer voice, who is always asking me to “actively participate” in “helping public transport” to keep the stations clean or to get beggars arrested. I hate his over-obvious marketing trick of including the consumer in his message, like “vienna public transport is working for YOU to give YOU the best in public transport”. I hate his stupid argumentations like “don’t smoke because it is against home security law” (I don’t smoke and I prefer people not to smoke but this argumentation is just fucking stupid). And I hate the inflection in his voice that sounds like back in the Eighties when the boss asked somebody from the sales department to record promotion spots. Like somebody trying to overdo private radio moderation and really thinking he is doing a super perfect job – no! You’ll never be better than Chris Lohner.Moreover, sometimes in the mornings I hear 3 or 4 of this damn spots while waiting for the train – somebody seems to be really bored at the end of his nightshift, right? Pushing the damn buttons for these messages to waken up again?
Basically, I don’t want to hear anybody talking in this super-pitched marketing voice, that’s why I rarely listen to radio (as if the stutter and stumble of most FM4-DJs would be any better …) This speaker nevertheless makes me even more grantig right there in the early morning.
Please, Vienna Public transport, please stop the announcements! At least between six and seven in the mornings, okay? I have never been bothered by any beggar, nor a thief, nor a smoker nor do I smoke, nor have I ever seen anybody messing up the stations. Thank you.

Schönbrunn’s main attraction

Every tourist coming to Vienna will visit the Schönbrunn castle. Just because you have to. There are many attractions there: the grand castle, the coach museum, the park, the zoo, the gloriette and what else. But I think the main attractions seem to be: squirrels.


Carrie Bradshaw called them “rats with nice fur coats”, but obviously tourists seem to be of the opposite view. Everywhere they are kneeling down, holding out hands, making strange sucking, smooching and slupring noises to attract them. Regulars feed them with nuts and have their special places. Kids are screaming “Mummy where!? Mummy where!?” and mummys are screaming back “over there, look, over there.” Other mothers scream: “Don’t go near or they’ll bite you! You’ll get rabies!” Depending on protectiveness, I think. One of them said: “I don’t like squirrels, one of them chewed my finger to the bone.” What? I also overheard a girl say to her boyfriend: “see, there is one. I am not fantasizing as you said.” But that opens up a whole different set of questions, I don’t want to go into right now.

Why are those little bastards so popular? I say because of their black little round eyes and cuty furry appearance. Also the sudden and unexpected contact to nature is a wonderful thing for city tourists. Or they’ll look at anything that is to look at for free.

Anyway, if you come to Vienna: go see Schönbrunn, visit the squirrels, don’t forget to bring some nuts.

What Up, The Weasel?

Anybody know what is up with the U3/U6 delays and the closing of Westbahnhof Station?

As I was riding the U3 today, the announcer first said that the problem was a “security incident” and that the trains would be running “irregularly”. Next, the train operator announced that the fire department had closed Westbahnhof and there would be no ability to change trains there.

Finally, they announced that the U3 was going only as far as Neubaugasse and that from Zieglergasse, one could get to Ottakring — but that the police had closed Westbahnhof.

As usual, none of the Vienna news websites I know of have any information, nor does Wiener Linien

Prominent panthers consume coffee

How Viennese!

And they don’t “gulp”, they “schlick”!


(Location: Südbahnhof)


At least if you are stemming from a catholic background.
Otherwise run for your life. Christian culture is coming!


(Crafty little puppets @ subway station U1 Stephansplatz.)

Saddest train station entrance

You can find the saddest train station entrance in Vienna @ Matzleinsdorfer Platz.

Please inhale its sadness and write some dark wave songs.


(I will not discuss this!)

Urban Light Hacking: Laser Tagging / Video

Metalab’s kewagi put a video about last week’s laser graffiti action online. Enjoy.

nudes in the city

I know, a lot of the buildings that make Vienna such a beautiful city were built in the late 19th century, when it was all the rage to adorn every wall with nudes (male and female). Here is an especially nice example:


This one is above the entrance to an old laboratory / factory for chemicals. Sex sells, ever since.

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