Archive for June, 2006

Weaving Porn @ 0>port

0>port opens its glass doors at Q21/Museumsquartier. It will be a place for visual and other arts.

Today they presented the public with a wonderful peace of applied arts-and-crafts…

Weaving porn!


Yes, right. Artist Lisa Malle took the tape of porn tapes and started weaving fabrics like carpets and other stuff with the sleazy basic material. The carpets — of course — are incredibly lightweight and the metallic glimmer is really gorgeous!

Missed it.

GW Gush

Originally uploaded by alpha600.

So I missed the toddler-in-chief and his 3 city-block-wide security blanket. There are more important things than paying attention to every spoiled brat that comes along.

But other people didn’t. Here’s one of the nicer wordplays at the demo.
(For those not familiar with the viennese vernacular: “Gusch!” means “Shut Up!”)

Dark Dune Spots

The scientific investigation of possible life in the South polar region of Mars is the topic of an art/science project called “Stained Perception”. It is located inside of the empty fountain of the Vienna Planetarium and part of the exhibition series “true/false inc”).
monochrom is part of the team project and we interviewed Ákos Kereszturi and András Sik, both members of the research team dealing with the so-called “Dark Dune Spots” on Mars.



>The Yes Men

The Yes Men are a group of culture jamming activists who practice what they call “identity correction”. They pretend to be powerful people and organizations and then use their newfound authority to espouse what they think those groups really believe. Its two leading members are known by a number of aliases, most recently, and in film, Andy Bichlbaum and Mike Bonanno.

The Yes Men: »Identity correction, infiltration and other easy answers«
Friday, June 23, 7 PM
Akademie der bildenden Künste Wien, Schillerplatz 3, Room M 13.


(Halliburton solves global warming! )

Cheap Schnitz


Food is one of the foundations of biological life. Culture is pretty much the same for social life. If you combine those two and leave out a lot of other aspects, results and factors, you get regional dishes. So much for well-written introductions.

Das Wiener Schnitzel has been with us Metbloggers for some time now. In Vienna’s vast and wonderful culinary world, it’s the one thing we all (except the Vegetarians, but that’s life) can agree on. No matter if you prefer roasted brains with scrambled eggs over horse meat loaf, or want your soup with kidney strudel or liver dumplings* – everyone loves breaded veal. In the last story I wrote about it, Mat raised a valid objection to my statement that 22 Euros will buy you between 4 and 7 Schnitzels in Vienna.

He wrote that this may well be true for pork or turkey Schnitzel, but if you want the real deal – tender, tasty veal – you have to cough up a lot more cash. And this, sadly, is true. I know not of even one fast food Schnitzel place that even carries veal anymore, and even many regular restaurant prefer the cheaper, easier to aquire and, in my experience, easier to prepare pork over real veal.

As I searched and pondered, I realized just how long it had been since I’ve eaten a real Wiener Schnitzel. Too long. But I’m really not willing to pay 12+ € just for a bit of tradition and a more refined taste. So therefore, I rephrase Mat’s statement into a question and relay it to you, the reader:

Can you get a veal Schnitzel in Vienna for under 8€?

Bonus points if the Schnitzel is not only made of dead baby cow, but also delicious.

* All real and existing specialities of the Viennese kitchen.

SaS 1 : Mind over feces

Vorsicht Scheisse

If you look to the right side of this site, just below the search bar, you’ll see a link called “Suggest a Story”. This is your direct link into the Metblogs subconscious, where you can plant ideas you find newsworthy into our collective mind. And now sans the new-age madness: If you find something that you think should be written about in the Metroblog, just click the link, fill in your info and send it, and we’ll make sure your 15 minutes of fame will be as pleasant as possible. Of course, you can post anonymously too, if your data is too hot to be linked to you.

Now, the reason I mention this is because we just got our first story suggestion by Teemu today, and it’s about dogs. You see, luckily dogs cause no real problems whatsoever, so we can continue to focus on shit.

Every day, dogs in Vienna produce around 25 tons of fecal matter, and a lot of that isn’t properly removed by the owners of said dogs. This petition might have opened the eyes of some people in the government about the problem – everyone who ever stepped in dog shit and had to throw away an otherwise perfectly well pair of shoes knows what I mean. And now we have the solution: an ad campaign.

32 different possible ads created by various advertising agencies are displayed in an online vote that runs until July 13th. Online votes, together with a jury, determine the winner till the end of July, and whatever image makes first place will be printed and shown around our little city. Oh, and if you vote, you can even win a wellness trip for two! Golly.

As for the pictures, Teemu’s favorite is this one, and while I love the wordplay, my personal winner is definitely this little gem.

Schnitzel around the globe

Since the last article made me hungry, here’s a little reminder: During my research on Austrian restaurants in Asia, I found this article about a place called Wallsé, located in the West Village part of New York. If you ever go there and order a Schnitzel, it will look like this:


And it will cost you 28 US Dollars. That’s roughly 22 €, or about 4-7 larger Schnitzels here in Vienna. Not to mention that no sane person would ever combine Schnitzel with cowberry sauce. If you search for this combination in Google, the only hit you get is a “Biker menu” offered by some roadside restaurant in Tyrolia – and with good reason. But I digress.

Wallsé also offers other typical Austrian food, like Spätzle, Palatschinken , Tafelspitz (Which is called Kavalierspitz there) or Almond Crusted Soft Shell Crab:


Yes, I remember, back when I was a child, I used to get an almond crusted soft shell crab every day after school from the almond crusted soft shell crab salesman at the corner. Oh those fine days of youth, when all we cared about was sunshine, laughter and our almond crusted soft shell crabs.


Image source and ©: Liao Yusheng

Metropolitan Siblings

The idea of partner cities (Historical tidbit: In North America, those relations are described as sister cities, while the Soviet Union called them brother cities) was born in the wake of World War 2. The idea was to bring different cultures together, so that major military conflicts like the one that just ended might be prevented in the future.

Seeing how World War 3 still hasn’t arrived, one might argue that the idea probably wasn’t all that bad – at least it hurt no one. The level of intensity in the contact between partner cities varies from place to place – from exchange programs and real cultural bonding to superficial and merely economical contacts, and today, with the European Union, many see the idea of partner cities as an artifact of a time long gone, back when people hated each other because they came from different places.. hmm, I’d really like to write that sentence one day without even a hint of irony in it.

Vienna’s partner cities are Zagreb, Warsaw and Belgrade, and, since 2005, Tel Aviv. This is quite an exotic mix, seeing how partner cities are normally chosen due to similarities. Most of the cooperation is on an administrative level – for example, there’s a cooperation between the civil defence groups of Vienna and Warsaw – and some go a bit deeper. Last February, the second annual “Vienna Days” took place in Zagreb – a mix of a cultural festival and a technology fair. Of course, the fact that Austria is the biggest single foreign investor in Croatia adds to this good relationship – but I don’t (want to) think it’s all about the Euros.

Economic reasons just tend to work well as a catalyst for social advances – at least sometimes. If you take a look at the ads of the Austrian railway company, they slowly start to include cultural events outside of Vienna – instead of “A scenic trip along the danube to St. Whatchamacallit, including coffee and cake”, you see information about jazz concerts in Prague or museums in Sopron.

Even if it’s quite late, I’m hopeful that we can finally realize that the iron curtain is gone – hipsters already realized this in the late 90’s of the last century and made Prague a hot spot back then. With some luck, the image of a grey, ugly, depressing Europe east of us, and the accompanying stereotypes and prejudices, will be gone some day soon.

And since the last passage was so full of pathos, here’s something cute: There’s not only partner cities, but also partner districts. And upholding the idea that we are eternally neutral, 8 Viennese districts have partnerships with places in Japan, while 6 districts teamed up with provinces, cities and districts in China – the first district even has partners in both countries.

And before the inevitable food jokes come: I could find an Austrian restaurant in Tokyo, creatively called Heurigenhaus (Doesn’t get very good ratings however, at least that’s what I think – my Japanese is only slightly better than my Sanskrit), and as for China, if you happen to be in Hong Kong, you can enjoy fine Austrian dining and a selection of Austrian wines at the – hang on to your seats – Mozart-Stubn.

Eminem. Age: 42.

I spotted Eminem near the Vienna Planetarium.
But he was 42!


a warm welcome


can one call that a life? never to see a city and it’s inhabitants. just see man in black around you, bulletproof limos and empty scenery…

the things you see as the president of the USA are never real, never what they seem.
let’s give that guy a warm welcome, a broad base of viennese activists thought. among them – just to mention a view – are: the muslim youth, the socialist youth, the communist party, the women in black, the forum palestine, a jewish peace organisation, the greens, the union and Cindy Sheehan, the peace-mom herself.

those people agreed on the slogan: peace, democracy and social fairness
friends of the schwarzes cafe (and people who wanna join me) meet @ schwarzes cafe in blechardgasse (U4 landstraße) @ 16:30.

the official meeting point is:
westbahnhof @ 21st of may, 17:00

cu, hh

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